Where Did The Decade Go To?

It seems the decade's decided it's going to end in little over 12 hours from now. As the year and associated premiere ten year period of what promised to be a new millenium full of hope and opportunity draws to a suitably uneventful close, many seem left with a sour taste in their mouths. Wasn't it about now we were meant to be riding our hover cars around the Millenium Dome as a swarthy and oddly attractive wise-cracking robot serenaded us into the new year with a note-perfect rendition of Auld Lang Syne? Christ, at this stage most would probably settle for a neurotic and slightly racist wind-up hamster dictating the Queen's speech over the radio. Though alas, here we are; in a world almost identical to that of 1999. Computers are faster, fame is more easily attained, prime ministers are fatter, presidents are blacker and I have distinctly more bodily hair than I did when entering the decade yes; but on the other hand, conflict still reigns in the Middle East, U2 remain bafflingly popular and the technology for a "Hendrix, Beethoven & Jesus: Back From The Dead And Rocking Their Greatest Hits" tour seems as far off as ever. 

This leads me to think, what does the coming period hold in store for planet Earth? One would hope the economy manages to pick up, the powers that be decide to pull out of Iraq (so not to get it pregnant) and perhaps Nintendo come up with a bitching new games console. We can hope for more than this, we can hope for less, but lets be honest: hope won't get us anywhere. Surely it was hope that got us into this funk in the first place. So I urge you all, go into the new year not wanting, wishing or praying; but simply drifting, waiting and seeing what happens. Make 2010 the year of the spectator. Watch in resigned and expected horror as the world falls apart around you, or be pleasantly surprised as we all join hands on top of a hill somewhere drinking Coca-Cola and singing a la their famous "I'd Like To Teach The World To Sing" campaign. Don't worry, if you're more partial to Pepsi I'm sure you could sneak it in, world peace is hardly going to crumble under a soft drink preference. Basically what I'm trying to say is that we could complain, grumble and moan without any distinct action taken every time something slightly inconvenient or unfortunate happens in the world or we could just plainly ignore it. That way on the rare occasion when something decent does come along we can all revel together in being slightly tickled, rather than having it overshadowed by the bad.

Perhaps you think my willingness to resign myself to another subpar decade is a reflection as to exactly why the world is in such a state right now, but at this moment in time I'm content to simply watch as we wave goodbye to the past ten years and revel in their aftermath. Besides, now we've got all the time in the world to think of a witty name for the upcoming decade.

I'll force-feed you more of my thoughts in the year that inspired this blog. 

Peace out,

Kid Sensible.

So It's Come To This...

I've often wondered what possessed people to blog. One could find it a little pompous when faced with a person who feels obliged to dedicate a small portion of the online media solely to their thoughts and opinions. A myspace here, a twitter there, a facebook for your troubles or a little bebo (an archaic form of communication now long forgotten, for the younger among you) should surely satisfy the needs of any aspiring pontificator. Still, the internet is covered in blogs; most of which are truly dreadful. The oh so self-aware hipster mindlessly double-ewe-tea-effing away at his Macbook in some ratty establishment dispensing tea and pretension by the cup. 20-something professionals living in their own romanticized version of London or New York, having moved from suburbia long ago with high definition dreams of gay best friends & Prada heels; as such beginning and ending every post with slightly pitiful Carrie Bradshaw-ish rhetorical quandaries - "Is the orgasm my white whale?" - or the typically peachy sounding Desperate Housewives style spin on a narrative statement - "They say every dog has his day, but for this dog his day was just beginning...". Of course there are plenty of perfectly earnest people blogging today simply to document their endeavours or keep in touch with friends & family in a far off land, but for every one of these we're faced with literally thousands of the aforementioned clichés.

You're surely wondering by now why a seemingly bitter old tart like me would ever partake in something I have such negative feelings toward. It's quite simple really. You see darling, as my new years resolution for the soon to be halted year gone by I decided to see how long I could refrain from engaging in one of life's simple post-pubescent pleasures: masturbation. Somewhat surprisingly I've managed to keep onanism out of my life for nearly an entire 12 months now, and in 3 days time I'll be needing a new challenge for a brand new decade. So here I am. Blogging is something I've considered for a long time but always shied away from, mostly due to the reasons listed above. Of course it's not quite as impressive a feat as being master of ones domain for 365 long and hard (I'm a stitch, right?) days, but I would see it as a relatively productive plan in that it gives me a way to hone my writing skills and force some opinions on the world at the same time.

I'm sure by now you've either lost interest or you're simply reading on to indulge your thoughts of "whoa, check this guy out. What a jerk. Does he not realize he's embodying every one of these blogland stereotypes as he damns their very existence? Epitomizing a culture while simultaneously lampooning it, pfffft! What are you? Like, 12? Jerk...", well if that's what you're thinking then you have a very valid point oh dear reader from the depths of the infonet, I also admire your use of the word jerk. Well allow me retort in ramble: I'm 18 years old, live in London (though I come from Dublin), I am a student filmmaker and aspiring writer, some may find me pretentious at times though this makes me feel emotionally poorly and misunderstood (much like Marvel Comics stalwart Galactus or Arthur Reid's teacher Mr Ratburn from the charming children's books and television series "Arthur"), as you can most probably tell from those references I am also a massive geek. I'm a (perhaps occasionally archetypal) homosexual, and in case you haven't guessed by now I would also assume myself to be terribly insecure, though I would think this is something which by its very nature can't really be confirmed by ones own self. So I suppose what I'm trying to say is that while I may not be entirely fond of a lot of things relevant in society today, I have to face up to the slightly uncomfortable (like jeans with a broken fly; you can wear them, but you're not happy about it) fact that I not only must deal with them regularly, I must also experience them every day when I look in the mirror. Not literally or physically of course, but I'm sure you catch the drift I'm pitching. So to close in classically disposable and buzz-wordy blogger fashion: Some blog for practically, some for image, some to fulfill romantic ideals, but all these things are surely entirely forgivable for regardless of rhyme or reason we are all but people sharing this vast and beautiful cyberphysical landscape. To blog is human. I blog therefore I am. In blog we trust. So please, shall we try to be only lovely to one another in oh-10, and blog simply for the joy of it all? Lets do.

Kid Sensible out,

Smooches.